The hardest thing for a girl, ok for me, is to put my feelings on the line when i like a guy. I dont like to tell them i like them, and i really really dont like to have to fight for their attention..especially when doors are slammed in my face(and i mean that literally). Its the most heart wrenching thing. Especially when you want to hate them, and you just cant. When a girl thinks that part of her makes her unlovable, its a hard thing to cope with. When a boy can listen to u cry on the phone and not even care. Yes its hard. As you can tell this all happened to me this weekend.
I went to provo utah this weekend "for the game"..ha wish that was the reason. but let me skip the actual road trip story for right now and continue with the boy story
Anyway i was down on myself. and i mean down. No matter how many times people say its not your fault..its the distance..or hes stupid, i still felt like there was something wrong with me...
this is when i started counting my blessings. I am so blessed to have cousins that dont even ask question, they just want to know where he lives. That kind of commitment is amazing. For friends who i can cry on their shoulders and they give me the honest truth whether it hurts or not because they want me happy in the long run. For friends who normally tease me abotu everything but sincerely tell me its not my fault. For best friends, who have a secret that made me crack up about him. teehee. For family, i mean why else would i love thanksgiving..it sure isnt for the turkey. Last but not least for my heavenly father, who loves me, and wouldnt have made me unlovable, who shows me that with his tender mercies.
*DISCLAIMER:also this blog was never meant to make anyone hate "him", stuff happens for a reason, and i still consider him a friend*
Now back to my road trip
So i hopped in the car friday mornign with my friends Bre and Cody and headed up to provo.
The ride up there was LONG to say the least but we listened to some sweet tunes and laughed
We heard "fo shizzle my nizzle" in a song and wondered what it meant..so we asked trusty chacha. haha it means " I whole heartidly concur with you my african american brother" ahahaha!
It so happens that ALL our friends from vegas that go to BYU were IN vegas this weekend.(3 of which got mission calls this weekend. Ricky is going to Denmark, Justin is going to Tahiti, and Todd is going to South Africa. I just wanted to take a quick second to count my blessings again, to be soooo blessed to have such righteous young men as friends)... So we had limited choices of people to hang out with. They were still awesome..but limited none the least. So friday me bre and cody got this really rad ice cream called sub zero...they put liquid in a bowl and then but nitrogen or something on it and it becomes ice cream...its magic
After that Bre cody and i drove around provo hitting on people. It was pretty entertaining. We also got to visit with my friend Kirsta and that was a blast! Next was the craziest part of the night...we went to this dance party and thanksgiving point...sounds like a makeout spot? haha but its not. its this random place north of provo. It was way fun...but it was a halloween party sooo tons of slutty mcslutpants. That night we didnt get home till about 3 or so but bre and i managed to stay up way late and just talk.
Saturday..we went to the BYU UNLV football game. haha that was AMAZING. seriously the whole stadium was BLUE except for a few red dots, which i happened to be one of those red dots, a very proud one at that. I did get booed. but it was really fun. We lost 35 to 42 but we put up a good fight. GO REBELS
Top Rebel fans have to stick together,... haha one guy had a shirt that said "cougar at school, rebel at heart"
3 comments:
i love you...we should make a sardene trophy! lol or when i'm down we can do the secret again:]
AHH, Sweetheart. I remember being your age and I am torn because I have this massive "LOVE/HATE" feeling when I think about it. I loved it because of all the fun we had. It sounds like you have great friends, just like I did. (and still do to this day) but I hated it because of the "drama trama" I went through. I still cringe when I think of all the times my heart was broken and how it must be because there was something wrong with me. (there wasn't) And the same goes for you. Don't let yourself get really down. Be sad (but not for to long) then pick yourself up and remember who you are and how much you are loved. And the right boy will love every bit of you. Until then have fun and don't do anything I use to do! J/K HA!
first of all.. even if you are still friends, i am going to punch him in the face!
second of all, i LOVE LOVE LOVE subzero... it is so magical!
and third of all, seeing what fo shizzle my nizzle means made my night!
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